Too often, I find myself lost in thought... I guess that's part of being who I am with the group of people I belong to. It's almost a requirement to have a short attention span with things you don't care about.

I keep going outside and wondering about what Lynne is doing at that point... Watch the stars and think of her, or watch the Moon rise over the bay and sparkle on the water... and think of what she's missing.

Or maybe it's me who's missing out, because she seems happy enough from what I can feel... Yes, I happen to have extrasensory perception of things around me and that is why I act different from others, becuase of what I see that they cannot.

I guess I'll have to wait out a lifetime to see her again.

"Carry on my wayward son, there will be peace when you are done, lay your weary head to rest, don't you cry no more..."

She calls me from the cold
Just when I was low, feeling short of stable.
All that she intends;
And all she keeps inside, isn't on the label.

She says she's ashamed
'N can she take me for a while?
And can I be a friend,
We'll forget the past,
but maybe I'm not able
And I break at the bend..

We're here and now,
Will we ever be again?
Cause I have found
All that shimmers in this world is sure to fade
Away
Again

She dreams a champagne dream
Strawberry surprise, pink linen on white paper
Lavender and cream
Fields of butterflies, reality escapes her

She says that love is for fools that fall behind
And I'm somewhere in between
I never really know
A killer from a saviour
'Til I break at the bend

We're here and now.
Will we ever be again
Cause I have found
All that shimmers in this world is sure to fade
Away
Again

It's too far away for me to hold
Too far away
It's too far away for me to hold
Too far away
Ahow
Yeah
It's too far away for me to hold
Too far away
It's too far away for me to hold
Too far away
It's too far away for me to hold
Too far away
It's too far away for me to hold
Too far away
Guess I'll let it go

Figured I'd go ahead and take another quiz. Don't do them very often anymore.


Protector


The ULTIMATE personality test
brought to you by Quizilla

Per Lost Love, these are my results for my personality test.

Disorder	Rating
Paranoid:	Low
Schizoid:	Moderate
Schizotypal:	Moderate
Antisocial:	Low
Borderline:	Moderate
Histrionic:	Low
Narcissistic:	Moderate
Avoidant:	Moderate
Dependent:	High
Obsessive-Compulsive:	Low
-- Personality Disorder Test - Take It! --

Speaking with Krystle lately...

"Well, I wonder why all these strange things happened after her death..."

Her

"I think she was really meant to be a guardian angel instead of living here... Besides that, had you met and she died, you would be much worse off than you are now. She needs to be where she is now so that she can watch over the ones she loves."

Having known Krystle for three years... I can safely say that she is my best friend and I trust her judgement and respect her opinions.

I'll be at work and start getting hot because of the sun beating down on me... Then I start thinking of Lynne. The wind starts blowing. It might not even be windy at all, but it starts getting windy the second I think of her... I tested it out and waited a half-hour... Thought of her again and the wind blew over me once more.

Just yesterday I was working at a higher class area of Destin, putting in another phone line for this lady who lived on the street. As I was digging a ditch to connect the line to the phone pedestal, I started thinking of Lynne.

"I don't get this... Why did she have to die? She had so much to live for... Why couldn't I have died, instead?"

Then it hit me...

"If I were to have died... She would have been even more depressed than she was before she met me, and would have died anyhow... and apparently I don't seem to be capable of dying at the moment, so it was just meant to be this way. At least she isn't upset anymore..."

At that moment, a strong gust of wind hit me...

She's still watching over everyone she cares about. I'll never forget her good bye to me...

"I love you Jonathan, and I will always love you. I don't know if you believe in that whole "guardian angel" thing... but I do. Well, you have one now. :P I will be watching over you. :)"

She never did break any promises or statements towards me... My only wish is that we could be reunited, physically as well... But that probably won't happen. I can always look towards the future and know I'll see her again, which is all that really matters now.